Staying connected

I am, like so many of you, disheartened by the steady stream of bad news coming out of Washington- of wrong decisions being made by people in power that detrimentally hurt the majority of the population. I will continue to call and write congress persons, just like so many of you. Sadly, I am also deeply disheartened like many of you by the Evangelical Christian church. We seem so far removed from who Jesus is and what He taught. When I look at it all, I wonder how can we as Jesus’ followers make a difference- impact people’s lives as He did and does. I come back to staying connected and centered on God. I come back to staying connected with each other- for when the light of my candle grows dim, I can see by your shared light, and vice versa. And I come back to- in the present moment- connected to all those around me and to myself, just as Jesus modeled. In the present moment we make a difference through our connectedness, as we see each person and care about each one, just as Jesus did. I write this as my connectedness to you is important. I am relying on that to help my light grow a little brighter.

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Inside Out by Rev. Jolene Bergstrom-Carlson

This is a word of hope for each of us who struggle with our sense of worth and value.

Inside Out by Rev. Jolene Bergstrom-Carlson of Ministry Mentors

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Presence

I grew up without a sense of presence in my family, without feeling like I was known or seen or heard. Home wasn’t really a safe place. My family loved each other, but everyone was broken in their own way.  It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It was just what it was. We were like 5 people living in a house alone, each living their own isolated life.

So as a child, I learned to be invisible. I spent a lot of time daydreaming, reading, and by myself. Through those things I learned to escape the reality around me.

When I was around 7, God surprised me. After being discounted yet again, I heard God speak to my heart. I heard God say, not to worry, that it was God who was raising me. I don’t know how I knew it was God’s voice at that tender age, but I did. I just knew. I was flooded with a sense of peace and comfort I didn’t quite understand. I knew God had me. I wasn’t alone. God was raising me. In those moments I felt the tangibleness of presence. I felt so loved, so known, so seen. I knew I mattered. It was unlike anything I had ever known. Presence saved me. I still remember what that presence felt like as a child and as a teen. It didn’t take way any of the heartbreak but that sense of God’s nearness to me changed my life.

Throughout my growing up years God provided presence to me through many dear people who God brought at just the right time. People who saw me, heard me, and loved me. So many dear saints from the church I grew up in, who I will forever be grateful for. People who included me and made me feel like I mattered. My heart is so full of love and gratitude to them.

Over the years, God has provided other people who have been gifts of presence to me, including my beloved husband and kids, treasured friends, and spiritual directors.   There is nothing like someone listening deeply to your heart from their  heart,  holding your story with a sense of sacredness.  I have been blessed by priceless people who have done that for me and it has genuinely changed my life and infused me with life.

No wonder presence means so much to me. In Luke 12:48 it says, “To whom much is given, much is required.” I have been so deeply blessed through God’s presence and the presence of those I hold most dear. As a result my life has become about offering the gift of presence  to those who need to know they matter, to those who need their story held with a sense of sacredness, who need to know they are seen, heard and loved. It is a life call, because it is a life gift. And so the gift of presence comes full circle.

 

 

 

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Learning from Fear by Rev. Jolene Bergstrom-Carlson

This post is written by Rev. Jolene Bergstrom-Carlson the Executive Director/President of Ministry Mentors.

This advent meditation deeply moved me and expressed so well what it is in my heart.
It is a word for our times. Hope you will read it and be touched by it too. Share it. These words though hard connected me to hope. May it be true for you also.

Advent 3: LEARNING FROM FEAR

To witness from the safety of a television screen, the fear in the eyes of families struggling to leave Aleppo, brings not only tears and heightens my own fears but also releases rage.

How can we as the human race participate in such lack of love and care for the lives of others?

How can we fear others so much that their lives and hopes and dreams don’t connect with our own love of our families and friends and hopes and dreams?

How can we experience our own fears and see the same fear in the bodies and souls of people around the world that some want to call “the other” and not respond?

How can we watch an elderly woman bent over with crutches hobbling in an attempt to honor her fears to flee from the threat of death and not scream:

NO MORE!

No more fear driven wars.
No more fear promoting leaders who want to feed their power.
No more domestic agendas that hurt vulnerable people.
No more children dying.
No more senior citizens scared to death that their only source of income may be threatened.
No more, no more, no more!
No more fills my soul. I feel empty and powerless.
I’m tempted to honor the voices of powerlessness. I’m tempted to remain in my cocoon of inertia.
I am only one unheard voice in the midst of millions of voices of power.

Then I remember the homeless people I see every day and know that more people must use the church’s food pantry.

I see the fear in the eyes of the children who speak a different language or wear different clothes.

My husband’s prophetic question replays in my heart, “Is fear really becoming our norm and casting out love?” Once again I scream: NO!

This time I hear my biblical sister Mary say, “Here I am, the servant of the Lord; let it be with me according to your word.”

May we be so honored and humbled to hear and heed her words.

Shalom,

Rev. Jolene Bergstrom Carlson
Executive Director/President
Ministry Mentors
http://ministrymentors.org/advent-3-learning-from-fear/
Ministry Mentors is dedicated to the well being of pastors. It’s tagline- pastors mentoring pastors.

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Sing One Heart’s Out

“I will sing a new song to you, my God; on the ten-stringed lyre I will make music to you.” Psalm 144:9

When I was growing up, I was always singing. I enjoyed playing the 45 and 78 records on my little children’s record player and singing along. The records were from children’s stories and movies, like 101 Dalmatians or Peter Pan. I loved to sing. It seemed like there was always a song in my heart that oozed out of me whether walking to school or walking to church. The songs just had to come out.

At church, the choruses were fun and meaningful and they replayed in my heart during the week. I sang in front of church and the school classroom. The only problem was when I got nervous I would start laughing and could not stop! While it looked like I was goofing off, I was really just nervous. It didn’t stop me though. I loved to sing, even if I did laugh some along the way.

As a teen, I learned to play the guitar. Our youth group was quite musical, but even more, we just loved to sing together. We sang everywhere. We sang on the beach or in one of our homes. We sang on retreats, and during the school lunch hour. Music was so much a part of us. We formed singing groups and sang at our church and a few others. Music was deep within us and it just had to be expressed.

As a teen, I spent hours playing the guitar every week, and I began to write songs.They were almost all prayers written from my heart to God. Singing became for me without my realizing it, a spiritual practice. I sang songs of joy of God’s goodness and nearness and enveloping love. Through music, I worshipped God and expressed my love to God.

Over time, the songs I wrote and sang encompassed more. I wrote songs of love for friends getting married, and for those who meant a lot to me. I wrote a song for my beloved spouse for our first Christmas together, and I wrote songs for our kids when they were born. I sang them to sleep every night. I shared with them the gift that was so deep within me- music. Singing was almost another form of breathing for me. It has been so much a part of me. How often I have cherished John Denver’s song, “This Old Guitar.” It has been a dear traveling companion these many years.

Singing has enveloped all of life and I discovered that it became even more meaningful and necessary during times of sorrow. I lamented in song over the tragedy friends experienced. I cried out to God in song when my dad died. I learned to sing my pain. How much that has meant. During times of great sorrow, singing out my lament helped me to grieve and it brought me comfort and relief.

Due to carpal tunnel, I don’t really play the guitar much anymore. And for some reason, over time, I haven’t sung as much either. I am not sure why, maybe life’s responsibilities filled my time. I am not sure, but I have missed it. I didn’t realize how much until I started singing again. My heart was uplifted and I greeted the music as a long lost friend.

For some, it is easy to sing when life is good, and it can seem almost impossible when life’s sorrows are great. The news of late has been filled with so much that has been heavy. It has felt more like a time to sing in lament. At Resurrection Covenant where I attend, we sing a song by Matt Redman, “Ten Thousand Reasons”. It is beautiful. This is the chorus:

Bless the Lord oh my soul
Oh my soul
Worship His Holy name
Sing like never before
Oh my soul
I’ll worship Your Holy name
Bless You Lord

With permission, the church changed the forth line to “Sing your sorrow and joy”. When our hearts are breaking, singing our sorrow can be a great gift. It helps us to grieve and it can bring comfort and relief.

Click on the link to hear Matt Redman’s “Ten Thousand Reasons.” I encourage you to change the forth line to Sing your sorrow and joy, and see how it speaks to you.
I am returning to Singing as a Spiritual Discipline, and I hope you will join me.

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A Standing Applause Sermon

I found this to be a challenging and powerful word by Rev. Shannon J. Kirshner, at Fourth Presbyterian Church.  It was an engaging way to interact with the scripture passage. It is a word that the church at large needs to hear. It is worth reading. The last half is particularly poignant.

Worshipers at Fourth Presbyterian Church-Chicago rose to their feet with sustained applause in response to the line in this sermon we have bolded in red. Scroll down for the line. THE PERSISTENT GO…

Source: A Standing Applause Sermon

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Reflecting…

I have not written in a long while. Life has been full. However, I have yearned to take a few minutes to write what is on my heart once again. So here I am.

I recently turned another year older. Often on such occasions it a time of reflection of what has been as well as what may be. So again I say, here I am.

Like so many before me, and those who will follow me, with age comes clarity, clarity about what is important and what is not. For example, it doesn’t matter so much about being right. So much time and energy can be spent that way. However, the reality is there are things that I know and there are things that I don’t know. With age comes an acceptance of that, and it is truly okay. I continue to learn and seek to grow because in that is great substance and meaning. I have learned that in this journey called life we continue to learn and grow. Indeed it is an integral part of our journey. At the same time, I am okay with what I don’t know. I am at peace to let God hold those questions and wonderings.  I have discovered it is freeing to do so.

At the same time, what I know, I know deeply, in the depth of my being. It has to do with  who God is and who God has been in my life and in the life around me. When I look back I see God’s fingerprints and footsteps throughout my life and in the world around me, and nothing means more to me than that. If I were to write all that God has been and done and meant I doubt there would be enough pages to contain it all. I consider my life so rich because of it. What I know is not based on my own life only, but on those with whom I have had the privilege to walk beside. What has and means so much is God loving everyone deeply, just as they are.   We don’t have to do anything or be a certain way to receive it. It just is. It is real. It is unconditional. It is healing, uplifting, and encouraging.  It so forms who I am. How deeply grateful I am to be able to come as I am and to be so lovingly received, just as is true for everyone. That matters more than anything.

When I reflect on that which means so much, then what doesn’t is easier to let go of, like titles and degrees, status and positions, and all the things we can find in society that divide one person or group against another, including who believes they are right. Life is not found in those things.

Life is found in relationship with- not against. So, what matters is love, simplicity, and humility. Gentleness, kindness, hospitality, an open heart, compassion are what make up the substance of life. My desire is to reflect these substantive characteristics which are found in the God of my heart and life. My desire is to love well and to show my gratitude to God and to those who fill my heart who mean more to me than ever before.  Life is a journey. May it be a reflection of God’s goodness, hospitality, and unconditional love and acceptance of all.  I am another year older, thankful for the gift of life.

 

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