Reflecting…

I have not written in a long while. Life has been full. However, I have yearned to take a few minutes to write what is on my heart once again. So here I am.

I recently turned another year older. Often on such occasions it a time of reflection of what has been as well as what may be. So again I say, here I am.

Like so many before me, and those who will follow me, with age comes clarity, clarity about what is important and what is not. For example, it doesn’t matter so much about being right. So much time and energy can be spent that way. However, the reality is there are things that I know and there are things that I don’t know. With age comes an acceptance of that, and it is truly okay. I continue to learn and seek to grow because in that is great substance and meaning. I have learned that in this journey called life we continue to learn and grow. Indeed it is an integral part of our journey. At the same time, I am okay with what I don’t know. I am at peace to let God hold those questions and wonderings.  I have discovered it is freeing to do so.

At the same time, what I know, I know deeply, in the depth of my being. It has to do with  who God is and who God has been in my life and in the life around me. When I look back I see God’s fingerprints and footsteps throughout my life and in the world around me, and nothing means more to me than that. If I were to write all that God has been and done and meant I doubt there would be enough pages to contain it all. I consider my life so rich because of it. What I know is not based on my own life only, but on those with whom I have had the privilege to walk beside. What has and means so much is God loving everyone deeply, just as they are.   We don’t have to do anything or be a certain way to receive it. It just is. It is real. It is unconditional. It is healing, uplifting, and encouraging.  It so forms who I am. How deeply grateful I am to be able to come as I am and to be so lovingly received, just as is true for everyone. That matters more than anything.

When I reflect on that which means so much, then what doesn’t is easier to let go of, like titles and degrees, status and positions, and all the things we can find in society that divide one person or group against another, including who believes they are right. Life is not found in those things.

Life is found in relationship with- not against. So, what matters is love, simplicity, and humility. Gentleness, kindness, hospitality, an open heart, compassion are what make up the substance of life. My desire is to reflect these substantive characteristics which are found in the God of my heart and life. My desire is to love well and to show my gratitude to God and to those who fill my heart who mean more to me than ever before.  Life is a journey. May it be a reflection of God’s goodness, hospitality, and unconditional love and acceptance of all.  I am another year older, thankful for the gift of life.

 

About evask50

I am a spiritual director, ordained minister, and retreat leader.
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